The Universe Builders: Bernie and the Putty Read online

  Praise for The Universe Builders

  “…had me hooked from start to finish. I must say I have had a lack of sleep as I couldn’t put it down, and when I did, I still thought about it.”

  Miriam Davison, author of Sand, Sea and Meadow Muffins

  “This book was fantastic! I was riveted, wanting to know what was going to happen to Bernie. The story has humor, a well thought out world of gods and their creations, and subplots interwoven in a way that makes this book difficult to put down. … a fascinating tale of good vs. evil and of a young hero on a journey of self-discovery.”

  S. M. Lowry, The Fringes of Reality

  “Wow… I gobbled it up! Unusual and intriguing plot…a mind-bending journey…and a great start for a series.”

  Ardis Schaaf

  “This book totally took me by surprise! The author does a great job of building empathy for his main character. It definitely kept me turning pages to find out what poor Bernie would have to go through next. There are some twists and turns that keep you guessing, and it ends wonderfully, leaving the door open for many possibilities. This story will undoubtedly capture your heart, as well as make you wonder if WE have our own Bernie.”

  Felicia Madura, author of Crimson Cloak, Born of Blood

  “This book was just wonderful! The story was captivating, and the characters were interesting and fun. I absolutely loved the storyline, and the story was quite original. I loved the story, and thought it was brilliant. It’s a wonderful new twist on how worlds and such are created. The ending … was just what I wanted it to be.”

  Hayley Guertin, Hayley’s Reviews

  “Everybody loves an underdog story, and I’m no different…but this is the first time I’ve read one where the underdog was a god. Mr. LeBel’s creative genius shines throughout the entire book, and I can only hope that this is the first in a series of Universe Builder novels. I would love to see this made into a movie…”

  Chris Snead

  “…a fascinating world populated by weird, crazy characters that will tickle your funny bone and, at times, tug at your heartstrings.”

  Linda Watkins, author of Mateguas Island

  “I expected to enjoy it, after all, every review I read was very positive, but I did not expect to be drawn in so quickly. The story had me captivated until the end and an overwhelming desire to see Bernie victorious kept me hooked.”

  Lynne Fellows, Just 4 My Books

  “Hands-down the best indie novel I have ever read. Best book, period, that I have read in at least a year. The writing is so descriptive you forget where you are. I could picture every moment, every scene, every person, as vividly as if I were watching a movie. Comparable to some of C.S. Lewis’ work.”

  Rachael Snead, author of Long Tail, Short Tail

  “There are times when the technical jargon flows so smoothly that you would swear Mr. LeBel was an Astrophysicist. Then at times he wraps the story like a mixture of Pratchett (they wear the same kind of hats) and Hans Christian Andersen. A story that can be enjoyed by any age. The possibilities for future adventures are limitless.”

  H. William Ruback, author of the SHORT of it…

  “LeBel’s humorous fantasy … will be a classic. … created a character who will wend his way into readers hearts… LeBel’s humorous insight into human nature made me laugh out loud at times and often brought a smile to my face. I wasn’t ready to say goodbye to Bernie at the end.”

  Darlene Blasing, author of Bargain Paradise

  “…thanks to LeBel, I’ve gained both comic and cosmic insight into what it might be like to have godlike powers. …I’m not so sure I’ll wish for such powers again.”

  J. Scott Payne, author of A Corporal No More

  The Universe Builders

  Bernie and the Putty

  Steve LeBel

  All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual gods, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

  Copyright © 2014 by Steve LeBel

  All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book in any form whatsoever without permission in writing from Argon Press, except for brief passages in connection with a review.

  Published in the United States of America by Argon Press

  ISBN-13 (ebook): 978-0-9910554-1-8

  ISBN-13 (print): 978-0-9910554-0-1

  Library of Congress Control Number [LCCN]: 2014900580

  (ebook v 2.51)

  www.ArgonPress.com

  For more: www.TheUniverseBuilders.com

  Dedication

  To the Bernie in all of us.

  Table of Contents

  Prologue

  The Time of Waiting

  Personnel Department

  Caleb’s Story

  The Waiting Continues

  Bad Ethics

  Beatrice’s Version

  Stock Boy

  The Interview

  Suzie Protests

  Tomorrow, It Begins…

  Weekend at Billy’s

  Suzie’s View

  Orientation

  Meeting the Boss

  Billy Bully

  Bernie’s Journal

  The Manuals

  Staring into the Abyss

  Lunch with Lenny

  Inspiration

  Creation Mechanics 101

  The Problems Begin

  Back to the Drawing Boards

  Lunch with Suzie

  Museum for Ideas

  An Idea is Born

  Lunch with Friends

  The Past Barrier

  Is It Me, or…

  Get Started Anyway

  It Begins…

  Payday!

  Bernie Goes Shopping

  Make It Green…

  Suzie & Sissy

  Oh, No!

  More Sabotage!

  The Backdoor

  Lenny’s Charms

  Shemal Startles Bernie

  The Putty

  Billy’s Gang

  Divine Intervention

  The Sun

  Not My Fault

  The First Expedition

  The Central Plaza

  Lenny’s Place

  The Second Expedition

  What’s Changed?

  The Headache

  Billy’s Healer

  Astrology Says…

  More Planets

  A Gift from the Sun

  Shemal Stops By

  Billy Returns

  Zardok Explains

  Gaia? Already?

  A Divine Event!

  Billy Is Sick Again

  Ring of Emptiness

  Tragedy at Sea

  A Favorite Bookstore

  A Garden Universe?

  Candi Comes Calling

  Burn, Baby, Burn!

  Candi and Lenny

  A World Ablaze

  Billy Scares Candi

  Bloody Moon

  Wake Up!

  He’s a Wimp

  We Must Explain

  Getting Discouraged

  A Little Breeze

  Oh, Do Tell…

  Wicked Winds

  An Understanding

  Sauna, Anyone?

  Suzie Intervenes

  Gee, It’s Hot

  The Deal

  The Hot Senate

  Shemal Talks

  That Billy!

  Let’s Try Faster

  Little Friends

  Something Is Very Wrong

  Someday, He Will Pay

  Blame the Night Sun

  Lookies!

  Alcandor Offers a Theory

  One Bright Spot

  Senate’s Progress Report
/>   How Can This Be?

  First Contact Protocol

  A Cultural Assessment

  Meet Your God

  A World to Save a World

  You Want Us To Go Where?

  Meeting with Zardok

  A Dead End

  Lenny Gets Upset

  What’s He Like?

  Alcandor Tells Gondal

  Still Best Buds

  We Must Agree

  Alcandor Learns More

  I Blew It

  Astronomy 101

  Zoology 101

  Quakes and More

  Command Performance

  The Rest of the Story

  A Time of Peace

  Alcandor Makes a Request

  Not Cool

  The Kids Prepare

  The Extraction

  What Are Those?

  This Is Lenny

  Time to End It

  The Museum

  Billy Destroys the World

  Damn You!

  The Booby Trap

  Go Home, Bernie

  Billy’s Threat

  The Last Goodbye

  Billy’s Lesson

  Committee Arrives

  Terrible Swift Sword

  Good News!

  Awards Ceremony

  Epilogue

  Did you like the book?

  About the Author

  Acknowledgements

  Prologue

  Have you ever wondered about the universe? How it came to be? The purpose of it all?

  Well, the answers may surprise you.

  Actually, there are a lot of universes out there. They come in every size and shape and flavor you can imagine. And the answers to your questions are very different, depending on which universe you’re in.

  Some universes are amazing. They’re full of beautiful planets, intelligent races, technological marvels, and other wonders. But some of them are not so amazing. Each universe is created by a god, of course, as is required for such things. One of the inconvenient truths is: not all gods are created equal. Oh, they have the best teachers and the best educations possible, and, over the ages, the gods have developed a good work ethic and a strong desire to do the best they can. But gods are pretty much like everyone else. They have their own share of overachievers and underachievers, motivated and unmotivated, and talented and not so talented, which explains why some of the universes out there are not really up to professional standards.

  This is a story about those gods. They live in The Town, on a planet they call The World. Their primary occupation is building universes, which they call The Business. You needn’t be much concerned about their lack of creativity in naming things. They all live in the same town on the same planet. And there isn’t anyone else in the god business, so they don’t need a lot of fancy names to differentiate these things.

  No one remembers how The Business began. They’ve been building universes as far back as anyone can recall. They will always be doing it. It’s one of those things gods do. It isn’t like they can just quit The Business and do something else. Their whole economy depends on the universes they create. And since it is the only thing they will ever do, they make it fun by seeing how well they can do it.

  The only real competition on The World is the Annual Universe Awards. This is when a special committee looks over the new universes to see if anyone has come up with something worthy of an award. After so many millennia, there is an award for every category you can imagine. The trick is to be better than the god who won that category last time. So if you are going for the Most Beautiful Planet, with forty-seven winners before you, each one more beautiful than the last, you have to be exceptional to become number forty-eight. But the competition is everyone’s favorite event, and the gods work hard to outdo each other. It’s the best and fastest way to gain recognition for your work.

  Not every god is cut out to be a builder, of course. Some gods are better at other things, which is good, because The Town needs cooks, librarians, plumbers and all manner of other professions as well. In school, everyone has a chance to become a builder, but as the classes keep getting harder and more challenging, there are more reasons to change your major to something else.

  To help you understand The World, we’ll take a look at an ordinary boy. He isn’t the smartest, although he isn’t dumb. He certainly didn’t distinguish himself in school, unless you count his reputation for being picked on more than most kids. He had few friends, perhaps because he came from a broken home. His mom worked hard to raise him the best she could, but after the divorce, she struggled to make ends meet. Our boy’s only claim to fame is his dad, who won three universe awards and became a major celebrity all over The World.

  We take you to our young god at a special time in his life. He has just finished school and is about to start his first job. An exciting time to be sure…

  The Time of Waiting

  The young god closed the door to his home, glancing from force of habit at the bridge path that led to The Town. Bernie had not taken that path for several days, nor would he today. Instead, he circled around to the back of the small home he shared with his mother. There he would take a less used path into the woods.

  “Where shall we go today?” he asked, although he appeared to be alone. “I know. Let’s go to the lookout point. We haven’t been there for a while.” His invisible friend did not reply, although a small group of twigs quickly assembled on the path behind the boy and began merrily hopping along in single file after him.

  Bernie would never have called his companion a friend, any more than he would have called his finger a friend. But he had developed a habit of talking to him as if he understood—and perhaps in some ways he did. He was usually better behaved when Bernie talked to him. If left to his own devices, well, then anything might happen…

  During his younger years, he had often thought of his companion as an evil force, something to be fought or battled into submission. For a long time he felt shame, as if it was a dark curse or some unknown flaw. He tried to hide it—still did, really—but that often just made things worse. Other gods had clouds, of course, but not nearly as strong. Nor as chaotic.

  ‘It’s not your fault,’ they had told him. ‘When each child is born, Order and Chaos fight for dominance. For most children, it’s a close battle, and the child ends up with only a slight inclination toward one side or the other. This imbalance is what we call the cloud, and, for most people, their cloud is rarely heard from. But for people like you, Bernie, your cloud is very strong. When Order and Chaos were supposed to fight for you, Order never showed up, and Chaos won by default,’ they said. ‘That’s why your cloud is so strong.’

  ‘You can’t win by fighting your cloud. You have to make friends with it. Try to understand what it wants. Learn to live with it,’ they counseled. ‘After all, it’s part of you.’ Bernie tried. Really, he did. But it was hard to be friends with something inherently chaotic. It was unpredictable, disorderly, unreliable, and often just plain stubborn.

  As the young god entered the woods, the sky seemed to darken. Here in the woods, the gods took no responsibility for encouraging or discouraging the trees from doing whatever they wanted, although the Town Council had talked about it often enough. One tree in particular—the Old One—was the subject of perennial discussions. The tree’s big offense was having attained a height so great that some complained it blocked the sun in much of the Northeast Quadrant. An exaggeration, perhaps, but that didn’t explain why no one ever volunteered to take it down. It didn’t explain their fear.

  Bernie’s path took him to the trunk of the great tree. “Hello, Old One.” Even from the far side of town, the great tree could be seen towering above their world. Bernie stroked his hands against the soft warm bark as if greeting a friend. The tree had been created by a god, of course, but it was so long ago no one remembered who had done it or why. Even its placement in the woods was a mystery. Perhaps it had been an accidental passenger, riding in the entrails o
f a more exotic creation, excreted on fertile ground, and left to grow. Bernie had been delighted the first time he touched it and discovered it was warm-blooded.

  Bernie put his ear against the great tree and listened to the slow quiet rumble of its great heart as it pushed the sap through its veins. “I think you will outlast us all,” he said as he stroked the soft bark.

  Bernie felt a small tap on his leg. Expecting a cloud-prank, he found instead a green vine rearing up like a snake in front of him. Although it looked like a plant, he knew it was not. “Ah,” he said as understanding dawned, “are you sure you want to go up there?” The vine creature tapped higher on his leg. “Okay, okay,” he said, “I’ll help.”

  Bernie gently grasped the slither, lifting it upward as its head snaked higher in search of a low branch. Bernie laughed as the slither wrapped itself around different body parts in its struggle to ascend. Finally, it wrapped its head around a low branch and began pulling the rest of its long body up the great tree. Slithers were always looking for tall trees where they could reach the sunlight. Once there, the tiny leaf-like scales that covered their bodies would fan outward, capturing the sun’s precious energy. If they found the right tree, they would spend their entire lives there. “You’ve found the ultimate home here, little buddy.”

  Slithers were one of the refugee species. The most common offense of a refugee species was over-population. When a god brought one of their creations to town, they were always careful to make sure the species was harmless to the gods. But sometimes the new species didn’t play well with others that were already here. If enough people complained, then the Town Council would take action and impose a ban. Usually the banned species was rounded up and thrown into an empty void. Sometimes a handful of them escaped the roundup and found safety in the woods. Well, they were safe from the gods… And they were safe from other created beings that had found their way to the woods. But the indigenous life forms that crawled up the side of their plateau from time to time, well, that was a different story. Perhaps it was a good thing the slithers spent their lives in the treetops.

  Bernie felt a guilty pleasure for his love of the woods. He didn’t know anyone else who felt the same. Most gods shunned the woods because of the danger. But this was Bernie’s backyard and much of his youth had been spent here. In school, he’d seldom talked about the woods. He’d learned it was best not to give people more reasons than they already had to see him as different. They already thought him strange.